If you are waiting for my weekly weigh-in, it's probably not going to happen. I don't want to step on the scale. Because the hard cold reality is that number dictates my mood. A number on a metal box will either make me feel happy or sad or a little of both. And I don't want to give that number that kind of control.
And I'm currently not looking at measurements either or exactly how my clothes fit. Because the truth there is that they aren't loose or falling off of me. They are however fitting me different. And when I look in the mirror I am seeing a stronger version of myself. I'm seeing tiny muscles emerge that weren't there before. I feel strong.
And I'm starting to see confidence... which is something that I have lacked for most of my life.
But I still have problems with perspective.
I posted a picture of me on instagram,
(You can see the pic here.. so go check it out and come right back). I almost didn't post it because I wasn't super confident in how I looked in the pic. But a friend commented how thin I looked. Granted it was camera angle and I was sucking in, but her comment did make me stop to take another look at myself. And I thought, maybe I am really not as fluffy as I really think I am.
Fast forward a day or so and looking at my x-ray from the Sports urgent clinic (You Need To Listen To Your Body) the first thing I saw (other than my crooked spine) were the fat rolls. I had no idea that would actually show up like that on an x-ray. But the doctor comes in and points out a bone spur that I have, and then said but wow look at the muscle attached to it. I told her I didn't see any muscle, all I saw were fat rolls. She said no no, look at all of these muscles. She covered up my rolls with her hand and started pointing out the different muscles in my stomach.
Wow, as long as I was fixated on the parts that I didn't like, I honestly couldn't really see the parts of myself that I was missing.
Can we say I got a light bulb moment!!!! It's all about perspective...and finding the right perspective... and this isn't just about fitness or body image... but life. A shift in perspective can change everything.
What are you focusing on? Is it time to shift your focus and re-evaluate your perspective?
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With more confidence comes more positive, REAL perspective. Cheers to not letting the scale dictate your day!
ReplyDeleteNice sharing! Glad to read your post!
ReplyDelete