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What Being Injured Is Giving Me

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I have to say that one thing being injured can give you is a lot of time to think. Sometimes this is a good thing - sometimes not so much. This year has been a tough one for me when it comes to injuries. The 5 month and counting hip injury really put a damper on my fitness goals this year. Then I got staph as soon as I was cleared to run. That set me back. Then the hip got super angry again, and now this (When Life Throws You A Curveball)

It's July ya'll, and I have only had a few weeks here and there this year of running consistently. It's been my worst year to date to deal with such issues. And mentally I was finally ready to run races. I had registered for both the Harrisburg and Hershey half this year. Well, we all know that's not going to happen. I'm still hobbling around in a boot. Thankfully, I was able to transfer those bibs through the registration system.

But, lately I couldn't help but wonder where does this leav…

Bib #109


Lots of emotions this week.. I turned 40 on Monday. The day was actually more difficult than I thought it would be.

Last night I looked at the registration information, and I'm officially registered. It was really weird to see my name, location and then 40 as the age. This marathon will be my first race at 40. Why not start off this decade with a marathon? :) I'm bib number 109.

I don't feel ready - not mentally or physically. So I have 10 more days to get my head in the right place. Even in writing this post, I wanted to say marathon attempt instead of marathon. Honestly, I'm really afraid I'm going to fail. I've never been one to have a lot of confidence in myself. And right now, I'm still searching to find the confidence in me. I think it's there (somewhere). I just have to dig deeper and find it.

I'm not the typical marathon runner. In fact, I still have a hard time seeing myself as a 'distance' runner. I was just getting my confidence about running longer distances when events seemed to change, and that confidence was truly shaken.

I'm slow. I will never qualify for Boston which is a good thing since that isn't a dream of mine. I don't even think I'm a 'middle of the pack' runner. When it comes to distance, I think I'm more the 'bringing up the rear' kindof girl.

So, why am I doing this? Why last June did I decide to train for a marathon (got injured, got well, and immediately started training again)?  There so many many reasons why. Some too personal to say. But one main reason is 'just because'. I need to do this for me. I need to show myself that I can tackle something such as a marathon, and that I can succeed. I need to see just how strong I really am.

I need to face my fear of failure.




Comments

  1. Happy birthday! Sometimes you just don't need to explain why you do things. Running a marathon is one of those things.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for the birthday wishes. And you're right. I don't really need to explain myself to anyone why I am wanting to do this :)

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