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Workin' On My Night Moves - Fear Of The Dark



Could it be? Was this just a fluke or was it for real? Is it possible that I am overcoming my fear of running solo in the dark?


Today, I got up before anyone else could wake up. I snuck downstairs, got on the treadmill to get 1 mile before the crying began. (Lil Man - not me). He got his flu shot on Monday. He didn't sleep well last night. He was upset that his 'green light' on his clock wasn't on. He didn't want me to run. He did want me to run. Basic, 3 year old meltdown. It just happened to be at 5:40am.


After some debate, I told the family I was running outside. I needed a few minutes - some distance to clear my head. I just needed a moment for me. I didn't want to get on the treadmill. Basically, I was 'over it' today. But I grabbed a long sleeve shirt, a jacket, my knuckle lights (affiliate link) , and my (affiliate link) NoxGear vest.  I didn't even have a charged garmin or tom tom (gasp I know!). I thought about turning on an app on my phone, but then told myself to get a grip. Just run for pete's sake - JUST GO RUN!

So I walked out into the dark early morning chilly air. I felt my breath quicken a little. (You know the huge black bear is out here roaming around somewhere. Shut up!) And I take a step. And another step. And then I take off running..... running into the darkness. My knuckle lights light the way. And my vest is so bright I'm pretty sure aircraft can see me. I get less than a quarter mile from the house (my pepper spray. I forgot my pepper spray. Maybe I should have taken my phone? Shut up!) JUST RUN!

I was running a familiar route so I pretty much knew the distance. (I wonder what my pace is? Will you just shut up and run?!?)  JUST RUN!

And run I did. I didn't run very far since I was feeling more tenderness in the hamstring than what I was comfortable with. So after my short run, I decided to walk it back to the house. I didn't feel defeated about any pace, or the fact that I was walking, or the lack of distance. It was a peaceful, solo, walk in the pitch black darkness. No fear - no freak out of being out there - just me - the stillness of the dark quiet morning.

Maybe running alone in the dark isn't so bad after all....





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Comments

  1. Great job! I'm still too chicken to run in the dark, so I'll stick to my good ol' boring treamill. :/

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    1. I'm hoping today wasn't a fluke!! :)

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  2. I am a few months away from getting my black belt in krav maga, so I have no issues going anywhere by myself anymore.

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  3. I don't do any sport but I do use my bike almost every day. Good job on running for your sport.

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  4. Awesome!!! Lobe hearing people doing fabulous things such as running!!! Wish I could get myself to actually run.... I'm too lazy ;-)

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  5. I'm not much of a runner but can see how running in the dark can be scary, especially in the early morning. Glad to hear that you are getting over your fear!

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  6. Well done you for finally running in the dark but next time phone and paper spray should come along too lol.

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  7. I'm glad you finally took that step. It sounds like it's the only way you can get any running time in. Ahh, the joys of family. =D

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  8. Those knuckle lights are really cool! That'd be a neat stocking stuffer for anyone - handy for halloween too. I bet they'd hurt someone pretty good too if you need to be ready to fight...just saying. I may get a set for my parents - they aren't runners but they do walk at night.
    Thanks for posting and congrats on running in the dark!

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  9. I used to love running in the dark when I was in college. But I haven't done it in ages because all the men in my life think it is too dangerous. GOOD FOR YOU for getting out there and really enjoying the running in the dark experience.

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  10. You've got this! Good job on taking the first "step" (pun intended)

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  11. It can be so therapeutic to run. Just having the time to go and clear you head can stay with you all day.

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  12. Sometimes it is just nice to get out in the fresh air. I get tired of walking on the treadmill and like to walk outside.

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  13. Good for you! Running is good for the soul ;)

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  14. I don't like running or walking in the dark. I am afraid. Good for you! I am envious.

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  15. I don't like being out when it is dark either... Glad you overcame your fear and got out!

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  16. I don't like the dark too. Use the threadmill instead.

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  17. I prefer night running to daytime sometimes.

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  18. Way to go!! I have to admit, I still freak out when I'm outside at night alone.

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  19. Did you realize how far you were running and how long? I've also experience a similar one--running in the dark and just challenging myself to catch my breath.

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  20. Wow, good on you! I'm not sure if I can run in the dark or go alone...

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  21. I'm too chicken to do anything in the dark, especially alone. =(

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  22. You're braver than I am. I'm not going out there in the dark, nuh uh, no way, no how. :)

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  23. I love running, but living in a big city, isn't too wise for me to go running in the dark. When I lived in the safe and quaint subs I loved it though!

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  24. Sounds like you had a peaceful run/ walk in the dark. I am always afraid of the dark outside because I have seen a bear and wolf in my neighbors yard which is fifty feet from my house. The woods in our backyard here though. Thanks for sharing.

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  25. I am so glad you are wearing the flashy gear so people can spot you! I get so scared for runners at night that aren't wearing any gear. It's freaking dark people!

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  26. I don't go for runs or walks in the dark. The world is just too crazy for me to risk it.

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  27. I could understand why you would be scared to walk or run in the dark. But great job on making progress in overcoming that fear.

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  28. Congrats! I def. don't go out walking or running after dark, I feel so vulnerable.

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  29. You are brave. I'm no runner and can't even imagine running in the dark this early!

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  30. That's great to overcome a fear like this. As for me, I'd be nervous to run in the dark. I just don't trust drivers at night, and we also have coyotes running around here looking for food.

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  31. I would LOVE to run alone in the dark but, in NYC, probably not the smartest thing to do.

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  32. I live in NYC and I run in the dark all the time at my neighborhood track. I like to see the sun comes up and I find I'm more at peace in the dark. Love your post and nice job on your run.

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  33. You are braver than I but glad you beat your fear. I don't live in the best of neighborhoods so that would be out of the question for me.

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  34. I used to think being alone in darkness never bothered me - until I got myself lost overseas - along in a secluded area @__@

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  35. I would feel terrified if I had to run in the dark! I don't even like running during the day!

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