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Learning To Enjoy The Solitude

Well, my long run this weekend turned into more of a long walk :) But that's ok, because the truth is I'm still injured so the fact that I can get out there and get 4 miles is pretty good at the moment. I had hoped to get 5, but I felt sluggish and started walking, then I decided since I was 'feeling it a little' that I'd cut it short at 4. It was 28 and a few snow flurries, and my hamstring wasn't a huge fan of the cold.

And you know what? I didn't feel disappointed or defeated in any way that I cut my run short. This my friends is a huge milestone for me.

I'm sure you've picked up on the fact, that I'm not one who really enjoys running alone. See, when I lived in Mississippi, I would meet my best friend Jill at an ungodly hour, and we would run and talk for an hour. Every night, I would look forward to our super early morning runs. It was a friendship that was formed over running, and to this day it still stands - oh how I miss her and her family.

When I moved to PA, I would go out running and come home crying. "I'm done. I'm not doing this again. I hate it here."
My Hubby would patiently respond, "Ok honey - do whatever you think is best." A day or two would go by and I'd go out running again. I don't know how many times that I returned crying. But I can tell you that it was several. Eventually, I started running again, but it was different - very very different. Running completely changed for me.

I did join a local running group. And they have been a great support. They are a very open welcoming crowd. And usually on any given weekend, you can find someone to run with which is nice.

But I miss having a steady running buddy - a steady running friend. And after a few times of thinking that maybe I had found someone here (although no one will ever replace Jill - no one. She is and always will be that special person that I met in the wee hours of the morning as I complained about the cold, and she would push the distance a little farther because I was directionally challenged. We never looked at pace. I don't even know if we tracked distance. We simply just ran to run. And to spend time together. And I know that no one will ever take that place). But I had hoped that I could find my running buddy here to call my own. I know it sounds silly. But it's the truth.

And after 7 years, well I've come to realize that I don't think there is a running buddy for me here. So it's time to learn to enjoy the solitude. I'm trying. I still feel myself rushing the runs to get back home. And I'm trying to learn how to slow down and enjoy the view.

So this past weekend, as my hamstring/butt wasn't happy with me, instead of feeling defeated and discouraged... I slowed down. I walked. I took some deep breaths. I did a little soul searching, and I took in the view.






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Comments

  1. Great post for thought. Its important to enjoy what you're out there doing. And sometimes that just takes embracing what you're given in order to do so. I've never experienced having a regular run buddy, but have learned to embrace the alone time and experience.

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    1. Thank you. :) And yes, it's very important to enjoy what you're out there doing. And thank you for taking a moment to comment.

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  2. What a pretty place to run! I wonder if you ran with someone, would you take time to notice all the beauty out there? I run by myself and I really enjoy that time alone...

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    Replies
    1. I'm trying to embrace the alone time! :) It is a beautiful place to run!

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  3. I'm a solo runner by preference, but I do understand we all have different needs. Don't give up on finding that "running buddy". I've met many more runners lately, folks who I never knew ran! Once your son gets to Elementary school, you'll meet more moms and there are always several runners in that batch ;)

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    Replies
    1. :) We shall see. I'm either too slow or too fast for the ones I know it seems like ha

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  4. Beautiful view, I used to run and had amazing running buddies but then I moved and moved again and kinda just lost interest after that so now i just admire people who do. Well done you

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